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It's getting to be sunny and warm outside, and that's when a man's thoughts turn to sighs. At least mine do.

I was standing on my back porch on Easter and observing the buds on the plum tree, shrimp plant and the potted osteospermis (freeway daisies) and shook my head.

"Many a young man's thoughts will turn to marriage now," I thought. I have to avoid feelings similar to the panic I had years ago when my crawling daughter was about to stick a fork she'd found into a wall socket.

"Here it comes," I mused. "Faith, hope and love. Let the games begin."

Don't get me wrong. Marriage is great. I've been happily married for 25 years come June (or is that July?).

Whatever. The point is, love is where whirling worlds whip into proximity and BOOM! They collide. The gravitational pull of the human - planets put their orbits in each other's path, and BANG! A collision. Bing-bada-bang. Many times these catastrophic results resolve in an unalterable (so to speak) trip up the aisle to marriage and the great beyond.

And what a big bang that is. The biggest there is. Forget about galaxies, star systems and supernovas. Those sad events pale in comparison to the impact marriage has on two starry-eyed lives headed for the jump across the great divide.

It's literally da' bomb. The big Kahuna. It's the biggest tsunami on the planet; like surfers trying to shoot the pier, the Pipeline and the point all at once while hanging ten and screaming with joy at the rush of it all while tons of crushing water cascade about the crown of their heads. Cowabunga.

That's marriage. If you know how to keep your balance on the surfboard, it's a way-cool trip through the tube, coming out the other end of that huge wave, wet and wild-eyed with all your nerves tingling and a big smile on your face.

It's a sunny day. It's good to be alive. What's not to like?

If you want to take that trip though - getting your kicks on Route 66, so to speak - you'd better spiritually wax your surfboards, y'all, to keep your balance or you're gonna "wipe out." And the bottom ain't sandy. It's coral). Ouch.

What to do? "Don't panic" is the advice from the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. And while you're not panicking, take another look at any marriage seminar near you. It's a good investment, nay, great investment, to preserve the first and best dream you ever had in your life - a life partner.

Marriage is never a task that is "accomplished," but it's easy to think autopilot will take care of most of marriage's challenges. Ask me how I know this. So try a marriage conference sometime. Churches around here have them often. Try one.

If married men are reticent about parting with the few bucks a conference costs, just think - you'll pay the equivalent of any fee with headaches and traveling those rough, bumpy roads of marital madness. If you're tempted to just sit at the TV instead, say to watch your team try to take the tournament trophy back to Texas, just think - the NCAA will always be there, but your marriage, which when you get right down to it, may not.

Which is more important to anyone's ultimate happiness at home?

Marriage is not a slam dunk. It takes practice and lots of it. Take a marriage trophy home. It looks good on the mantel.

This year (in June evidently says my wife Janet) I'll have been married 25 years. She laughs at my jokes - like when I'm kidding about when my anniversary is (dodged that one) - and I've seen her in new light as I take another look at who she is, what she is and just what God intended when he brought her into my life.

Her name, Janet, means "God's Gracious Gift" and the logical conclusion of marriage is that we are a gift to one another. At one point, we all knew that when we got married. It's too easy to forget.

As I dwelt on that year after year, something remarkable happened - I changed. Anyone who used to know me would say that's amazing. One guy even told me, "If you can change, anyone can."

Thanks for the insight, friend, but there you have it. "Anyone can." Anyone can change their marriage. Anyone can come to Christ. And anyone, anyone, anyone can change. Even if you're in prison. Even if you're a mess at home. Even Patrick Butler.

It takes a lot of honest looks at life, but God reminds us every day - there is hope for everyone.